Self Worth.

I feel that at times, I find myself more worried about the outcome of many decision in my life, then actually believing that the decision I made is the right one. I have been going through a few weeks of roughness, and as I walk this journey, I find more unwanted feeling coming into play, then having the spiritual, emotional and mental enlighten I was had. It is not like I am giving up  on my dream, the vision in which God has given me, but there are just times I feel as if everything I am putting together is not going the way I picture it would, nor the way I live is worth living. So I find myself questioning my self worth, my inner being, my way of living, and even my purpose upon this earth.

You may not come to understand the degree of this feeling, but as we grow into a new being either from educationally purpose, or even spiritual aspect, there are still those doors inside of us we do not wish to open up. Even at this point, I find myself trying to keep those doors close, not wanting those old feeling, those old ways of thinking, those old actions to come out and destroy everything God has put together.  The power of the past, is stronger then people think. But I want you to know that the past only gain power by allowing those days of pain, confusion and discomfort become the very source which we base our life upon. I refuse to do so, so everyday seems like a struggle, and if I find myself losing, I some how feel as if I am disappointing the Lord above.

Strange, but that saying when it rains, it pours! I see that is true. It is as if one problem get solved, and the next problem come full force, without any warning or delay. But I am a strong man, I have experiences many things in life, and have overcome many things. I have turn my life around, not by my own hands, but by the will of God. My self-worth is valuable then gold, silver and even green money. It is a prize that the devil desire, but the Lord above has. So as long as I know that life is valuable, and as long as I know that God is the one that holds the key to the chest box, I will continue to strive, maintain and produce the very source of love, mercy and forgiveness that Christ has given unto me.

Well; I am going to let you go for now, but I pray that those who have read this blog, will see the value within themselves, and know they are worth more then silver and gold.

God Bless

Reverend Smith